Dear Covid,

You changed the entire world, and unlike WWII, which transformed the US in positive ways – for one, the ability to mass produce penicillin which saved my life when I was three – you changed the world differently. In a way that no of my generation could have ever imagined.

I work hard each day to find the good that it caused.

My mom lived through WWII. She traveled to the US from Germany with my grandma (Baba) and great-grandma (KeKa). I often wonder how they lived through that, and now I know that our grandchildren will wonder how we ever lived through Covid.

I survived covid – My best friend Tony – my brother from a different mother – did not. My confidant, Spencer’s uncle. I miss our conversations. I miss his “hey you” when he answered the phone. His “Victoria, you have to understand” when he was unhappy with me! And, most importantly, his unconditional love for me and his gratitude for his life in this country.

How do you find the good in losing someone so close to you? It’s hard, but you must. Last week his wife, Adele (my sister in my heart), and his mom – Clelia (we call her Tata), drove up to the Cape for some respite. We sat on the porch, drank wine, BBQ ‘d, told stories, cried, and made plans.

One thing about Tony is that he loved his culture and his county – Nicaragua. We always spoke about going there together. He so wanted to show me and Spence the county that he loved. We talked about it often. We never made the journey.

In August, I will make that journey with Adele and Tata. It brakes my heart into a million pieces that we did not do this while he was alive. And I know that tragedy can have a purpose. I would like to know what awaits me and what I will learn.

You divided the world and sent people’s lives in new directions that each person has perceived differently.

I feel grateful and blessed that I came out on the other side. No matter how covid affected my life, I will not waste one day not doing what I want, being grateful for all the people in my life (past and present) because I have no control over when I leave this earth. I want no regrets.

So, thank you for giving me the insight to see how concise life is, and I only have control over what I do and no one else.

VC